As they led him away they took hold of a certain Simon, a Cyrenian, who was coming in from the country; and after laying the cross on him, they made him carry it behind Jesus. A large crowd of people followed Jesus, including many women who mourned and lamented him. Jesus turned to them and said, “Daughters of Jerusalem, do not weep for me; weep instead for yourselves and for your children, for indeed, the days are coming when people will say, ‘Blessed are the barren, the wombs that never bore and the breasts that never nursed.’ – Luke 23:26-29
Today is Good Friday, the day we recall the passion and death of our Lord. Many people have reflected upon the stations of the cross on the Fridays of Lent, especially today.
The Eighth Station has always stood out in my sex addict mind. Sex addicts, men and women alike, often engage in behaviors that are risky. For some, the risk of an unwanted pregnancy is like the risk of getting caught in a public place. It increases the thrill, until you are actually caught or conceive a child.
These unwanted pregnancies are a mark of behavior we regret. While some people can welcome the child lovingly into their lives, some of us may resent the child, and many of us choose to give the child up for adoption or to have an abortion. For both women and men, these last two choices often come with a great deal of shame and guilt. We lose our own flesh and blood on account of our addiction.
So, indeed, we may find ourselves crying out, “Blessed are the barren!” Perhaps you’ve thought to yourself, “if I were sterile, I could sleep around without worrying about the burdens of pregnancy.” Maybe you’ve made yourself sterile for that very reason. We do some elaborate things for this master we call sex addiction.
Whatever shame and guilt you have, offer it to Jesus on the cross. He gave His flesh to free us from the sins of the flesh. He died to destroy our guilt and shame. And we know that He rose to restore us to new life, not only in Heaven, but here and now.
The grace of the cross is given in the sacraments. Go to confession! God is waiting for you.